There is nothing in substitute for the truth then where do white lies fall in place? Well somewhere on the gates of the greater good where gray prevails. Speaking of gray, the de-novo colours of sweatshirts, we find there is this curious little habit of ours of not telling the whole truth.
Of course you did go outstation for that conference but well, little intelligent you did not tell that your extra day was actually not accidental. The official version of events was bad weather and the flight got delayed. Oh yes, your clandestine activities did go undetected.
This is one example and we have others like taking a whole day to shop in a sale where you bought that leather bag with a 5% discount. Yet what you tell your friends over brunch on Sunday while munching on rolls is that you were bargain hunting and things were indecently cheap, probably even cheaper than the rolls you are eating.
It seems diluting the truth either by exaggerating or over-simplifying it is something of norm. Weaving florets on monotony and obscuring rancid from the fluorescent mess is something we rather do than stray into the lanes of lies. It maybe something deemed trivial or something downright dangerous but who is do deny it wasn’t necessary. Yes, a necessary evil it was; to deglaze and shine and yet we were not lying, thank you very much.
We do it for many reasons. For obvious ones like avoiding unnecessary conversation by people who have more time than us at the present so that it sounds mundane and we can continue on real business and these people will find some other victim. Sometimes it is not to lose face and be lapped with some attention for something totally ordinary. Most of the time it is for ourselves. An individualistic desire to not to be put in a situation of being bitten by our conscience for lying. By doing this, we avoid pangs of guilt and are contented by the fact that there was a morsel of truth beneath that waffle.
Call it cheating yourself, call it suave but the best of us and the worst of us do it.
Monday, July 20, 2009
Thursday, July 16, 2009
"It is important to look good"
I have heard the phrase above many times.
You know in reference to interviews, engagements, dates and a whole lot of other important end-outcomes.
Those dreaded first impressions?
Does the colour of a necktie or a cut of a dress tell whether a person is efficient? Does it mean that if you naturally have hooded eyelids; you are condemned to be lazy? The point is that first impressions do not tell anything much about character. It in fact hides a lot of things like laziness, inefficiency and all kinds of lousy traits.
However, I am not championing on going to meet a person with T-shirts stained suspiciously and unwashed hair. Those things are detrimental to you and the person next-to-you and is not pleasant on the eye.
Not pleasant on the eye.
Not pleasant on the eye.
Contradicting it sounds, actually because if you take it far enough, it would be alright to hire the handsome gentleman because the guy with the braces is an eyesore. Few words: it is plainly unfair. For one simple logical reason: you might not be choosing the better person because of something so superficial. Period.
We have to draw the line and I think the part about whether whatever that irritates your occipital lobe* is really detrimental or not should be defined. Not technically very hard: I sometimes choose to write them out on paper to remove the visual bias. I am open to better techniques though.
* the part of the brain concerned with interpreting what we see
Mirror, mirror on the Wall,
Who is the Fairest One of Them All?
We humans like beautiful things and everything positive is associated with being beautiful in the loosest sense. What was supposedly neutral is perceived as positive. Cinderella was beautiful and her evil sisters had to be ugly. Witches were undoubtedly with crooked noses. In short, ugly humans were bad humans. Even food had to look good with garnishing so much to wet our appetites. Is it instinctual? No, I think it is a very wronged learned behavior to appreciate skin-depth beauty based on pigmentation preferences. Cavemen were icky. Look I am into this now. It is ingrained to say so much. Before we are mature enough to appreciate true beauty (the one which is formed by positives), this dangerous principle has been seeded into our subconscious. Even this skin depth philosophy is tainted and crooked in its own way, some people still see tall, fair (which is so unfair ... oh the malignancy has spilled into syntax too) and thin as beautiful. The irony of fair being unfair is enough to speak volumes on our so, civilized nature.
My point is ...
Bad habits are difficult to weed out. Watching children watching their weight, dying of anorexia, resort to stealing to finance their labels, losing self confidence and the ensuing vicious cycle. This dreaded prophecy is almost as equivalent to shoving the reality of the situation right under our noses. If we still choose to deign to ignorance and continue teaching our kids wrong lessons, don't complain when civilization crumbles because it was important to look good.
You know in reference to interviews, engagements, dates and a whole lot of other important end-outcomes.
Those dreaded first impressions?
Does the colour of a necktie or a cut of a dress tell whether a person is efficient? Does it mean that if you naturally have hooded eyelids; you are condemned to be lazy? The point is that first impressions do not tell anything much about character. It in fact hides a lot of things like laziness, inefficiency and all kinds of lousy traits.
However, I am not championing on going to meet a person with T-shirts stained suspiciously and unwashed hair. Those things are detrimental to you and the person next-to-you and is not pleasant on the eye.
Not pleasant on the eye.
Not pleasant on the eye.
Contradicting it sounds, actually because if you take it far enough, it would be alright to hire the handsome gentleman because the guy with the braces is an eyesore. Few words: it is plainly unfair. For one simple logical reason: you might not be choosing the better person because of something so superficial. Period.
We have to draw the line and I think the part about whether whatever that irritates your occipital lobe* is really detrimental or not should be defined. Not technically very hard: I sometimes choose to write them out on paper to remove the visual bias. I am open to better techniques though.
* the part of the brain concerned with interpreting what we see
Mirror, mirror on the Wall,
Who is the Fairest One of Them All?
We humans like beautiful things and everything positive is associated with being beautiful in the loosest sense. What was supposedly neutral is perceived as positive. Cinderella was beautiful and her evil sisters had to be ugly. Witches were undoubtedly with crooked noses. In short, ugly humans were bad humans. Even food had to look good with garnishing so much to wet our appetites. Is it instinctual? No, I think it is a very wronged learned behavior to appreciate skin-depth beauty based on pigmentation preferences. Cavemen were icky. Look I am into this now. It is ingrained to say so much. Before we are mature enough to appreciate true beauty (the one which is formed by positives), this dangerous principle has been seeded into our subconscious. Even this skin depth philosophy is tainted and crooked in its own way, some people still see tall, fair (which is so unfair ... oh the malignancy has spilled into syntax too) and thin as beautiful. The irony of fair being unfair is enough to speak volumes on our so, civilized nature.
My point is ...
Bad habits are difficult to weed out. Watching children watching their weight, dying of anorexia, resort to stealing to finance their labels, losing self confidence and the ensuing vicious cycle. This dreaded prophecy is almost as equivalent to shoving the reality of the situation right under our noses. If we still choose to deign to ignorance and continue teaching our kids wrong lessons, don't complain when civilization crumbles because it was important to look good.
We do not borrow this earth from our grandparents, but we owe them from our children.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Just Not Into You?
I watched a show many months back and I think there is a book ,"He is Just Not Into You?"
Though it was mainly for romance and dating, let's just extrapolate into the lives of the lonely and empty.
Humans much like Sims yearn for social company.
To be acknowledged, to be praised, to be shot down, to discuss, to be inflamed, to bicker or plain gossip.We love to be the centre of attention even if it boils down to one person. Actually most people just it with one or two or three. Crowds of millions might just call for propranolol.
Nevertheless very few enjoy being lonely.
Yes, we love our moments of solitude. Alone is when one hears one's own voice. This is important for this self forms the crux of impulses and split-second decisions which matter.
It however best kept in durations of moments.
But when it stretches out into a monotone that you start hearing your own echos, feel alone even when you are amongst people and the fact that people actually only converse to you when they need you; seems to be like they are just not into you as yourself. The worse being those moments when you are physically alone for a few seconds and it hits you like a truck: the realization of the ugly side of everything superficial.
Not that anything is wrong with you. Even if you are "difficult", every cloud does have its silver lining. Sometimes it is appearance, sometimes it is in the nature of being reserved, sometimes it is the boundaries of norms and the list is truly endless. Plainly it is hard to meet like-minded people who aren't stereotypical. I still haven't met someone who likes paleontology and astronomy. Sometimes it is also the part about the lack of reciprocation: you are there with a 110% invested and they seem to throw you blue moons' worth of responses for your many missed calls.
Yet we do meet people who are like-minded though they can easily fall into the "just not into you?" category when you haven't heard from them like for awhile. That is when you take a breath, try to clear ,"Lonely ... I am so lonely" out of your head and stop being a little selfish ... People have lives to live just like you do. Unseen to you are their many commitments, obligations and a many other things pleasant and unpleasant. It is of little compensation but a logical rationale nevertheless.
It is sometimes not always about you. Yes people are not always into you. Some people plainly need you for your abilities rather than your own emotional needs. I always imagine that you end up being dry, crusted and extremely lined if you only think about this.
This is because it is truly depressing and restless but think about the millions who live a physically much difficult life than yourself. Going to school involves kilometres on foot, getting clean water being a miracle and suddenly apple martinis and your need for devotees seem guilty.
Oh perspectives! Nasty essential speed-breakers are they? Just not into you or are you yourself not into yourself? Or is this feeling deeply rooted on the need to fill up your time? Endless debates that we orchestrate ourselves which actually have simple solutions:
Fill your time.
Live your life.
Stop thinking about stopping.
And you will realize happiness is neither an exclusive privilege or unaffordable luxury.
Though it was mainly for romance and dating, let's just extrapolate into the lives of the lonely and empty.
Humans much like Sims yearn for social company.
To be acknowledged, to be praised, to be shot down, to discuss, to be inflamed, to bicker or plain gossip.We love to be the centre of attention even if it boils down to one person. Actually most people just it with one or two or three. Crowds of millions might just call for propranolol.
Nevertheless very few enjoy being lonely.
Yes, we love our moments of solitude. Alone is when one hears one's own voice. This is important for this self forms the crux of impulses and split-second decisions which matter.
It however best kept in durations of moments.
But when it stretches out into a monotone that you start hearing your own echos, feel alone even when you are amongst people and the fact that people actually only converse to you when they need you; seems to be like they are just not into you as yourself. The worse being those moments when you are physically alone for a few seconds and it hits you like a truck: the realization of the ugly side of everything superficial.
Not that anything is wrong with you. Even if you are "difficult", every cloud does have its silver lining. Sometimes it is appearance, sometimes it is in the nature of being reserved, sometimes it is the boundaries of norms and the list is truly endless. Plainly it is hard to meet like-minded people who aren't stereotypical. I still haven't met someone who likes paleontology and astronomy. Sometimes it is also the part about the lack of reciprocation: you are there with a 110% invested and they seem to throw you blue moons' worth of responses for your many missed calls.
Yet we do meet people who are like-minded though they can easily fall into the "just not into you?" category when you haven't heard from them like for awhile. That is when you take a breath, try to clear ,"Lonely ... I am so lonely" out of your head and stop being a little selfish ... People have lives to live just like you do. Unseen to you are their many commitments, obligations and a many other things pleasant and unpleasant. It is of little compensation but a logical rationale nevertheless.
It is sometimes not always about you. Yes people are not always into you. Some people plainly need you for your abilities rather than your own emotional needs. I always imagine that you end up being dry, crusted and extremely lined if you only think about this.
This is because it is truly depressing and restless but think about the millions who live a physically much difficult life than yourself. Going to school involves kilometres on foot, getting clean water being a miracle and suddenly apple martinis and your need for devotees seem guilty.
Oh perspectives! Nasty essential speed-breakers are they? Just not into you or are you yourself not into yourself? Or is this feeling deeply rooted on the need to fill up your time? Endless debates that we orchestrate ourselves which actually have simple solutions:
Fill your time.
Live your life.
Stop thinking about stopping.
And you will realize happiness is neither an exclusive privilege or unaffordable luxury.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Apples and Oranges: The Search for the Balance between Opposing Worlds
It is inevitable that things will never be the same as you left it.
Either you would have fast-forwarded or worse ... degenerated.
Suddenly you realize: how did I get here?
Why is everyone speaking Greek and Latin?
When did everything known and safe change?
Ultimately ... the "Why am I so in the dark ages?" question will pop up and there is little remedy to that except going on thinking and thinking about choices and fate until you sound psychotic (pretty much like now).
The other end is equally unpleasant: dealing with cavemen is not easy, thank you very much.
And where are we? Right in the middle.
Stuck in this stalemate, we are resigned to make do with what we have.
Not a bad thing, actually.
Greener pastures do not exist, we form them.
We have to fertilize, plough, seed and weed our niche.
Image Copyright: http://www.greenhutgalleries.com/products/images/0wha025.jpg
In that, maybe we would
find that elusive golden mean,
where true happiness and peace lies,
where life's very framework lies.
To own the sense of independence, the deciding-stroke of your destiny and to live.
What a hope!
Either you would have fast-forwarded or worse ... degenerated.
Suddenly you realize: how did I get here?
Why is everyone speaking Greek and Latin?
When did everything known and safe change?
Ultimately ... the "Why am I so in the dark ages?" question will pop up and there is little remedy to that except going on thinking and thinking about choices and fate until you sound psychotic (pretty much like now).
The other end is equally unpleasant: dealing with cavemen is not easy, thank you very much.
And where are we? Right in the middle.
Stuck in this stalemate, we are resigned to make do with what we have.
Not a bad thing, actually.
Greener pastures do not exist, we form them.
We have to fertilize, plough, seed and weed our niche.
Image Copyright: http://www.greenhutgalleries.com/products/images/0wha025.jpg In that, maybe we would
find that elusive golden mean,
where true happiness and peace lies,
where life's very framework lies.
To own the sense of independence, the deciding-stroke of your destiny and to live.
What a hope!
After Anne and Beyond
Finally Anne Frank is done.
Few simple words: non-fiction and real life accounts are by the law of life: incoherent, unpredictable and don't simply have the edge to hold ones attention unlike their fiction counterparts.
Nevertheless, Anne was something I deemed necessary and yes, it was worth it even with all the teenage whining, over-thinking and asphyxiation.
Now it is done and I can finally have peace of mind.
Few simple words: non-fiction and real life accounts are by the law of life: incoherent, unpredictable and don't simply have the edge to hold ones attention unlike their fiction counterparts.
Nevertheless, Anne was something I deemed necessary and yes, it was worth it even with all the teenage whining, over-thinking and asphyxiation.
Now it is done and I can finally have peace of mind.
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Uh Uh ...
That's what you feel when you realize that a Pulitzer Prize winning book is not your cup of tea. Hopefully, the other book I bought- Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl lives up to my insanely evolved razor-edged reading taste-buds (or maybe I have fallen in love with Miranda Priestly's character).
Either way; its not relaxing reading such books or helps you to fall asleep (it conversely keeps you awake debating for hours and hours with yourself ... hopefully I have not misread my first signs of insanity). Nevertheless, they are eye-opening or if you'd rather say: making you stop turning a blind eye on the inevitable truth shoving it right before you and ringing a klaxon saying, "WAKE UP!"
Scary but a necessary realization.
At least I realize, I am not frightened of ending up working without holidays and I am at the core ... culturally rooted unlike some of my fictitious acquaintances.
Though I secretly wish they were.
Either way; its not relaxing reading such books or helps you to fall asleep (it conversely keeps you awake debating for hours and hours with yourself ... hopefully I have not misread my first signs of insanity). Nevertheless, they are eye-opening or if you'd rather say: making you stop turning a blind eye on the inevitable truth shoving it right before you and ringing a klaxon saying, "WAKE UP!"
Scary but a necessary realization.
At least I realize, I am not frightened of ending up working without holidays and I am at the core ... culturally rooted unlike some of my fictitious acquaintances.
Though I secretly wish they were.
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